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SO HI GUYS! I'm alive, I swear! /o\ I kept meaning to update since mid-May, and I started and restarted updates for a couple of weeks before... just about giving up.

Basically, it's been thesis 24/7 around here. It's been taking forever, and I had so little of a life for most of June, but I'm finally actually done with all of my actual writing of the thing; I'm waiting to hear back from my advisor so that I can make my edits and pass the whole thing around to my committee to finally just defend. So I am so close I can taste it, but oh god do I ever just want it to be overrrr. :(

Anyway! While I fully intend on updating soon with shit about my recent life, this post is not about me. This post is about xsnarkasaurus, who has been a friend for years and moved earlier this year, to the city she loves best, with some animals and her kid. Money's been tight for her for a while (because, uh, moving is expensive as shit? And so are kids? And so is, you know, life?), but things have been piling up more recently, and she just found out that the job she thought she was getting was actually a scam, and so she is really extra fucked right now, and I cannot imagine how much that sucks.

A lot of you know Steph, and even if you don't, I know y'all are wonderful generous people who would love to help if you could, but I also know that most of y'all are probably not in the greatest financial shape either, unfortunately. So I figure that, hey, if you're giving to a good cause, you might as well get something for it, right?


The Big Damn List of Shit Maja Will Offer You If You Give Money!

• $1 per 100 words -- either all in one fix, or any combination ($5 for five drabbles, $10 for two 500-word ones, etc.)
• After $10, $1 per 200 words (limit 3000 words)
• Legit plot is $1 extra (lolol I feel a little bad for this, but lbr, my real talent lies in hooking people up and getting them to porn) (Also, to clarify: this is only if you ask for legit plot up front; if it happens to sneak in there of my own volition, you're good!)

Fandoms I'll write for... oh boy. Look, can we mostly do this on an ask-and-ye-shall-receive basis? I'll try to name the big ones. Books, all Gaiman, Harry Potter, a bunch of classics, all Sharon Shinn, Pendergast except the last two, Outlander, ASOIAF except ADWD. TV, Lost, Firefly, Sherlock, Criminal Minds, old-school sitcoms, half of Once Upon a Time and Grimm, and I'll at least consider HIMYM and Glee, sure. Mostly recently The Avengers and all assorted have been eating my mind, so requests for that will make me happy! Otherwise I can't even begin to list movies. Any OCs of mine are fair game, too, and I'm also 100% willing to write original fic because I love doing that.

I'll also write basically any scenario you have in mind, though AUs are my lifeblood (esp. of the college variety) and I do genuinely enjoy romcom scenarios/porn. /o\ I'll write almost any pairing, or gen, or any kind of crossover, and my only other requirement is that you give me a prompt of some kind. Be it a word or a description or a picture or a song lyric or just an AU setup -- I just need something to get the juices flowin'.

I'm pretty sure most of you guys have read at least some of my writing, but devilputaside is where I'm at, though sadly most of it is from ages ago and I've improved since. >__> (Those on my flist can also go here to see some more recent porn I've written!)

• $2 for five icons; $1 for each five after that
• $5 for 25
• 25 is my limit for icons of any single subject; you can request more than that, but of multiple subjects

So I'll basically icon anything. If you want to send me a photoshoot or pictures you have in mind, go for it! Or give me a person, or a PB for RP icons, or a subject (trees, yarn, books, coffee), or even a keyword (happiness, spring, cozy comforting feelings), and I'll do what I can with it. \o/

Examples of past icons I've made.

• $2 per five songs; $1 per song after that
• $5 for ten songs; $1 per two songs after that (limit 30 songs)
Or, alternately:
• $2 per roughly 15 minutes; $1 per five minutes after that
• $5 for roughly 30 minutes; $1 per five minutes after that (limit... whatever the hell 30 songs amounts to timewise? I GIVE UP)

Again, I'm really flexible with these -- I'll make mixes for characters, pairings, or overall fandoms, or for moods, or for occasions, or for prompts. Or if you just want to check some new music out, I'll make you an assortment! Anything goes here.

Examples of past mixes I've made (plus most of the last half of these comments), though none are downloadable anymore, SOB, but I can reupload any of those for anyone who'd like them.

• $2 for 4x6 prints; $5 for three, and any additional are $1 after that
• $3 for 5x7 prints; $5 for two, and any additional are $2 after that
• $5 for 8x10 prints; $10 for three, and any additional are $3 after that
• Random grab bag: for $5, I will pick out three pictures for you (two 4x6, one 5x7); you can pick the category, or give me total discretion, and I'll try to impress with something pretty! ($7 will get you two 4x6 and one 8x10, or three 4x6 and two 5x7.)
• If you want any of them matte, $1 extra per print
• Any image manipulation (saturating/desaturating, increasing/decreasing contrast, tinting, any effects) $1 per print; excluding b&w or sepia-toning, which I'll do for free.

My Flickr is over yonder; pictures are mostly sorted by location, with some themes (concerts, food/drink, etc.). My collections group certain chunks together -- London and Edinburgh into the UK, four Maryland cities into a state, the Cherry Blossom Festival and the zoo into DC, etc. -- and my sets are each individual themed folder. Browse at length -- I've got about 1,500 pictures in there.

If you'd like any further context for any of the pictures, I'll be happy to provide! I'll eventually do it on Flickr too, but I spent an absurd amount of time setting this guy up, and I wanted to put this post up ASAP, so... figured I shouldn't delay much longer. >__>

• $2 per bracelet with three colors; $1 per additional color (six colors max)
• $5 for three (with three colors each)
• $1 discount on any two with four+ colors; $2 discount on any three with four+ colors; $3 discount on any four with four+ colors, etc. (limit six bracelets)

I feel a little silly offering this, because this type of bracelet is all I can make, but I still have tooons of thread that I will never ever in my life use otherwise, and they are pretty fun to make, so!

List of colors: red, dark red, light orange, orange, yellow, dark yellow, light green, green, dark green, light blue, blue, dark blue, light purple, purple, light grey, grey, light pink, pink, dark pink, light brown, brown, white. Whew.

Baked Goods:
• $10 for a dozen cookies; $5 for each additional dozen (limit three dozen)
• $10 for a dozen brownies; $5 for additional dozen (limit two dozen)
• $10 for a dozen bar cookies; $5 for additional dozen (limit two dozen)
• $10 for a dozen muffins or unfrosted cupcakes; $5 for additional dozen (limit two dozen)
• $10 for a dozen scones
• $10 for any combination of the above equalling a dozen (e.g., six cookies and six muffins); $15 for any combination equalling two dozen (limit two dozen for combinations)

Baking is pretty much limited to anything that I can ship neatly without it going bad -- hence no frosting (also no cheesecake, no pies/tarts/galettes, no crumbles/cobblers/crisps, etc.). It'll probably get either stacked in disposable Tupperwares or wrapped carefully in foil. But if you can think of anything else that would ship neatly and I haven't listed here, feel free to ask! I'm also pretty willing to be flexible -- I'll try a new recipe for you, make a recommendation, mix and match, etc. I can do multiple types of cookies/brownies/muffins/etc., but I'll request a limit of two combinations for everything but cookies, and a limit of three for cookies.

Also, shipping is super expensive, so this isn't necessary, but if you're willing to throw a few extra bucks my way to help cover it, I'll be exceedingly grateful. And maybe up your order accordingly. >__>

Unfortunately, I'm going to go ahead and say I'll only ship baked goods within the continental US, because I am a currently-income-less poor grad student. I can, however, send photography and bracelets anywhere!

I also have a sizable collection of books that I've been intending to get rid of; I was going to put a bunch out at a yard sale later this summer, but I'm willing to type up an index of them if anyone's interested, or just surprise you. They'll probably go for $5 each, possibly as low as $3 depending on condition/trashiness of book. These, too, would get set continental-US only, and a couple of extra bucks to me to help cover shipping would be awesomely appreciated, but definitely not necessary.

Proceeds should go via the PayPal account armadillosoufle[at]gmail.com! Just shoot me a screenshot showing your amount donated (you can do this in a comment or via e-mail, essentialcadential[at]gmail.com), make your request, and we will talk specifics from there. :D

I'm going to go ahead and leave this public in case people would like to share it; I don't anticipate this getting a huge amount of traffic or anything, but I would like it to spread past my flist, if possible! I would just, as always, request discretion in terms of connecting my fannish life to my real life, please and thank you. ♥

And thank you guys in advance! I will truly appreciate anything that you can offer, and I know Steph will too. ♥

Entry originally at http://blindmadness.dreamwidth.org/180296.html (comment count unavailable comments); comment wherever you'd like. ♥


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 30th, 2012 03:26 am (UTC)
So now that I've stopped crying because of your awesomeness. ~tacklehugs~
Jun. 30th, 2012 09:09 pm (UTC)
Awww man, you're such a sweetheart. I'll just go make a donation, I don't need anything in return <3. Or, if you really want, you can make me a mix :D!

Will put this on my twitter too, just in case <3.
Jul. 1st, 2012 06:10 pm (UTC)
I was gonna say "I might be interested in some of the books" but then you wrote US only. Howsabout if I cover shipping, would you be willing to throw books across the pond to Europe? Well, y'know, provided you have something I fancy :P
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )